A poem I wrote as I pondered my life as a house and invited God to take me on a tour.

A reminder to keep seeking what lasts...

In every stage of life, God is always leading us into a deeper healing and freedom. That’s the beauty of sanctification in the Christian walk. We are loved as we are by His grace, but He loves us too much to let us stay as we are. We must continue to yield to Him in the work He is doing, even when it’s hard and we don’t understand.

Little did I know, there was no perfect decision. There was simply freedom to prayerfully choose what seemed best, to receive the benefits joyfully and also mourn what would be lost. I didn’t want there to be any tradeoffs. I just wanted there to be the perfect decision that met all our needs perfectly. I often still want this when making decisions.

What if prayer is not only a way to turn our attention and faces to the Living God for our own sake, but bending down low, getting our hands and knees dirty, and helping Him direct things happening in the unseen?

What is the connection between these realizations? Perhaps that I am meant to live on a farm with real cows. But also, I think we’re all meant to live more like farmers… more embodied lives with a bit of dirt under our fingernails, tired from a solid days’ work. Too many of us have busy lives and manicured hands. We are tired, yet not content. Working, yet without a clear connection to our purpose and place in the world.

Maybe it’s best not have too many goals for the year. What if you can just keep walking faithfully, trusting God’s leading, and following the good path He has set before you?

But the good news is that this “crazy” points to a deeper reality. It points to all our unmet expectations and longings. It highlights everything in our own hearts, families, and the world that doesn’t align with this image of perfection.

“The secret place” seems a secret to me.

I look, I search, but I cannot find it.

This space where you speak loud and clear.

It was settled for me. It was certain … there is so much more to life than what we can see with our eyes. Mary would never see her baby girl age beyond that point, but she gazed down at her in pure admiration and joy, seeing past death and into the eternal. My heart exploded with hope.

It all points to God being Lord of it ALL and in it ALL. He is in the blessings of this life, He is in the sorrows, and He is the only One who can mix joy and sorrow together to make something beautiful.

What they did in the hiddenness mattered to God.

Because He was doing something over generations.

This is a thought that doesn’t cross my mind very often because I am VERY prone to fear and preparing for worst case scenarios. (Hello enneagram type 6).

But when it does, I am filled with hope and peace… like flying up 30,000 feet above my situation and suddenly having new perspective… His perspective.

Joy is not a delicious apple we can pick off a tree, but a wild, rushing river we can jump into and let it carry us through many seasons.

Whether life is breezy or marked by sorrow, you can still jump in. Let it take you. Let it wash over you. Learn to swim in it.

Jesus is our Prince of Peace, but He does not give us a superficial kind of “it’s ok, you’re ok” peace that sits like a bandaid on top of what needs to be murdered. He is the One who wants to ride like a maniac and shoot our sin between the shoulders like Jehu…

Or are you still on meth Cheryl?

This is the question everyone is asking lately. They mean “are you ready for Christmas?” But they aren’t asking about your soul or your standing before Christ. (Gulp). They are asking if you’ve shopped for everyone, planned all the meals, decorated the house, the yard, etc. etc.

“Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings. I cling to you; your right hand upholds me.” - Psalm 63: 7-8

A poem written after days of listening to the wrong voice…

Getting to be whoever you want to be and do whatever you want to do with your life sounds like freedom. But endless opportunity can be its own kind of slavery.

It’s the age old question: Do we really want to do whatever we want? Or do we want to be entrusted?